It’s Sunday! You aren’t doing work and you’re hungover as hell. Enjoy this comprehensive list of the 8 most stimulating, rewarding activities to do on the day God literally deemed ‘the day of rest’.
Straight up, Wikipedia is the only reason why I know that there are 50 states in this country. And not to be like, whatever, but I donated $1 the other day! I always knew I was a good person. Check out some of these links and soak up some really useful information about the world.
2. Clip Your Toenails
You know you’ve been putting this off for a while, and you know you aren’t doing any work today, so you might as well. The strange thing about clipping your toenails is that it’s actually quite the activity. Well, it’s quite the activity if you bring yourself to clean up the mess. Toenails are alarmingly aerodynamic.
3. Take Some SAT Prep Tests to Validate Your Intelligence
Now this, THIS is a wonderful way to brighten up your day. Feeling down on yourself for not starting that paper? Regretting those 4 Vodka Redbulls and your interaction with your TA last night? Prove to yourself and the world that you ARE smart. Trust me, sitting down with a practice SAT test and remembering that there are people who literally cannot read will make you feel pretty fucking fantastic. And if you disagree and think that this is a terrible idea, you might be right. I’ve never actually done this and probably never will.
4. Untangle Some Necklaces
Grab some tweezers and some Adderall and get ready to fill your afternoon. This sort of task takes extreme focus and motivation, and is probably worth making your Snapchat story. Although untangling necklaces may seem like a mindless activity, think again! Ever wonder how doctors learn to perform surgery? Yeah, knotted jewelry.
5. Straighten That Crooked Poster
Audrey Hepburn has been crookedly staring at you since the beginning of the year. Do something about it.
6. Remember Some Things That You Haven’t Remembered In A While
Seriously, when was the last time you really just took some time to remember some things? Right???? Crazy. Memories are cool, and sitting in your room and thinking about that one time you shit your pants, or when Chris accidentally said that he thinks his sister is hot, or when you thought that Vienna was in Italy (still shocked that it isn’t) is probably one of the most productive things you can do with your day.
7. Experiment With Advil
Last Sunday, I was feeling really adventurous and totally took my drug abuse to the next level. I don’t want to spoil anything, but popping 6 Advil and watching Sophie’s Choice changed my life forever. More feelings have never been felt than on that afternoon.